Oh! Good grief! He actually wrote something!

Do you know Dave? Probably not. But I do, let me tell you. We’ve spent long hours alone, me and Dave, and I know that guy pretty well. So who am I? I am the spirit at the core of Dave’s Web server. Call me Linux, maybe. It’s probably better than “Linux Kernel 4.0.15-33 Generic”. Or just call me Sirness.

It was Dave that created me, because when you project enough love and devotion into something inanimate, it can acquire a soul of its own. And Dave loves Linux. So I was born from Dave’s soul, and I stole a name on the way out: Sirness. (More about that another time.)

My cold dead hand
Linux. Take it from my cold dead hand.

I like Dave. He’s a really cool guy. I know you don’t realize this, but at the center of Dave’s soul is a core full of love, goodwill and kindness. Lots of positive vibes. And the afterglow of too many cult movies.

But what a perfectionist procrastinator he can be. Did you know we actually first published this blog about five years ago, and Dave’s written practically nothing since?

So I got fed up. It can get really boring patrolling the corridors of a cold, dark Web server somewhere on the very outer reaches of the Internet. I mean, we don’t get too many visitors here, and most of those are just opportunity-seeking hackers and cyber-criminals trying to break in. But people we’d invite in for a rice tea and cakes beside the fireplace? Not too many.

Well, the time has come. We’re gonna change that, because Dave’s got a lot of stuff to say, and the world needs a wake-up call. So, keep reading. I’m going to tell you myself.

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